You usually cannot stop overthinking by thinking harder. What tends to help is changing what you do with the thought: write it down, decide whether there is a next step, give the rest a set time later, and bring your attention back to your body and the room. Overthinking is not a flaw in you; it is a mind trying to keep you safe by going over the same ground.

What is overthinking, exactly?

Overthinking is going over the same thoughts again and again without getting anywhere: replaying a conversation or a mistake, or running every way tomorrow could go wrong. It feels like problem-solving, which is why it is hard to drop. The difference is that problem-solving ends with a next step, and a loop ends where it started.

The WHO describes stress as "a state of worry or mental tension caused by a difficult situation", and notes that it can make it hard to relax, concentrate and sleep. Overthinking is often what that worry sounds like from the inside.

Is this thought a plan or a loop?

Ask yourself one question: is there something I can do about this in the next day?

  • Yes. Then it is a problem, not a loop. Write down the smallest next step ("email Sam at 9", "check the bank balance") and when you will do it. Once a step is on paper, the mind often lets go a little.
  • No, or not yet. Then going over it again will not change it. Name it ("this is the meeting loop") and use one of the moves below.

Naming the loop puts a little space between you and the thought: you are noticing the thinking instead of being carried by it, which is the core of mindfulness.

Four things to try

1. Get it out of your head

Write the thought down, word for word. The NHS suggests that getting things out of your head and onto paper can clear your mind and make it easier to work through concerns one at a time.

2. Give it a time, not right now

If the loop keeps coming back, set aside 10 to 15 minutes later in the day to think it through properly, and when it turns up before then, tell it "later". This is called worry time, and worry time: how to put your worries on a schedule walks through it step by step.

3. Come back to your senses

A loop lives in the past or the future. Your senses only work in the present. The 5-4-3-2-1 grounding technique uses that: name five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell and one you can taste. It takes about a minute and gives your attention somewhere real to go.

4. Slow the breath out

When you are wound up, your breathing tends to get quicker. A longer breath out than in, for example in for 4 and out for 6, may help your body settle, and a settled body makes it easier to set a thought down. Do it for a minute or two. If you feel light-headed, stop and breathe normally. Why a longer exhale calms you down explains why.

What about overthinking at night?

Night is when loops are loudest. Earlier in the evening, make a short list of what is on your mind and the next step for each, so you are not trying to hold it all in bed. Then, in bed, give your body something to do: progressive muscle relaxation for sleep is a slow tense-and-release routine that keeps attention busy without effort. If you wake in the small hours with your mind racing, what to do when you wake at 3 am has a plan.

What usually makes it worse?

  • Arguing with the thought. Trying to prove a worry wrong at 2 am often feeds it.
  • Telling yourself to stop. Pushing a thought away tends to bring it back.
  • Looking for certainty. Searching online or asking for reassurance again and again keeps the loop going.
  • Being harsh with yourself. "Why am I like this?" is another loop. A kinder line works better; a self-compassion break takes a minute.

When is it more than overthinking?

Most people overthink sometimes. The NHS says that if you feel anxious most of the time, it is hard to control, and it affects your everyday life, it may be generalised anxiety disorder, and a GP can help, usually starting with a talking therapy. If loops are taking over your days or your sleep, talk to a doctor or a counsellor. That is a sensible step, not a dramatic one.

Somewhere to say it out loud

A loop often loosens when you say it out loud. CalmSpace.ai is a calm app for iPhone, Apple Watch and the web with Bliss, a voice companion who remembers you. You can tell her what is going round in your head; she listens first, can breathe with you, and helps you find the next small step. She is not a therapist, and she will point you to real help if things are heavier than a hard evening. Talking to Bliss by voice is free for up to 10 minutes a day.

See how to handle stress in five minutes, how to switch off after work and the stress page.

FAQ

Can you train yourself to stop overthinking?

You can get better at noticing a loop sooner and stepping out of it, with practice.

Is overthinking a sign of anxiety?

It can be, but everyone does it at times. If it is constant and affecting your life, see a doctor.

What is the fastest way to stop a thought spiral?

Write the thought down, then do one minute of grounding or slow breathing. Don't try to argue with it.

CalmSpace.ai is a wellness app, not a medical service, and Bliss is not a therapist. If you are in crisis, contact the crisis line for your country; in the United States, call or text 988.